Thursday, March 06, 2008

The Birthday Party

Two of the Children Raised By Wolves have birthdays coming up next week.

Fellow Traveler and I have been discussing what to do for these kids. We can't give them money because their parents will take it away from them. (FT worked it out with the oldest that, when he does odd jobs at the Big House, she will give him half his wage for his mother to take -- she'll do that anyway -- and squirrel away the other half in a secret hiding place for him on our property. How incredibly sad that we have to play these kinds of games with the kids' parents.) We can't give them gifts with any kind of monetary value because the parents will pawn them.

So we are going to take the two birthday boys out to eat on the eve of their birthdays. Fellow Traveler told them they can go anyplace they want except McDonald's. Oldest Child broke out into a smile...thought a moment...then said, "I really don't know what places there are to eat."

We know they like pizza, so we're aiming for a local place that serves that, and also has a couple of arcade games the kids can play.

We've found out that Mama Wolf has been keeping these kids out of school for no good reason (other than that she can't rouse herself out of bed early enough to get the children ready for the bus). We're rapidly reaching the tipping point of sending in professional reinforcements. But, no matter what happens to these kids in the future, we really want them to know that not all adults are like their parents and the others who've failed them; that there are people who care about them and mean them well; that there's a way of life other than what they've experienced thus far. We want them to be able to look back on a day when they had fun with no strings attached.


P.S. an after-thought said...

I would think that the fact that they don't go to school much would be a good opening for calling someone in to check on the situation. However, maybe due to budget cuts, there is no one in the school system to actually DO any checking about this. After all, the school already takes attendance. They either put caring about attendance into action or they don't.

You are walking a tightrope. May you be blessed by your caring. Matthew 25: 34 - 46, ie the ELCA Lenten theme.

Tom in Ontario said...

It's sounding more and more like those kids shouldn't be there with their parents. It sounds harsh but what's best for the kids?

PK said...

I'll keep you in my prayers as you discern about calling for help.

cheesehead said...

I don't know what the answers are, but I do know that you and FT are a blessing to this family.

((((LC and FT))))

Rev Scott said...

Ditto what Cheese said.

I'm amazed even in my new call with college students how many of them are dealing with parent issues. For all the talk about hyper-vigilant, over worried parents (and I'm married to one), it sure seems like there are a goodly number of us who are destroying our children in other ways.

Verdugo said...

I would echo Rev. Scott's post and the concerns of others that things seem to have devolved to the point where "the authorities" might be a much better option than the reality, sad as it is to say.

On the birthday gift question, I'm wondering if perhaps the gift of "an experience" (which I always like to give anyway) might be the best gift for these kids since mom can't return/exchange/pawn an experience. Particularly something that might spark a passion along an educational line for them.... would they enjoy piano/guitar/art/ballet/kayaking/ whatever lessons? Pay for a season of AYSO (or the local cultural equivalent). Could you (if willing) take them to a museum/play/concert/sporting event/science center in a nearby town?

more cows than people said...

i just caught up on lots of your posts and i am moved by the way you are seeking to care for these kids, this family, in healthy, generous, boundaried (is that a word?) ways. whatever you decide to do ultimately, this birthday experience will be a gift... a true gift. and you've already offered so many- even the times you have said "NO".

Bless you and bless the children raised by wolves.