Thursday, November 17, 2005

If I Needed You...A Game For the Easily Amused

Here's a great blog-game, courtesy of Derek at Haligweorc :

1. Google your real first name, followed by the word need, all in quotes.

2. List the top ten phrases that Google spits out.

Here's what Google came up with for my name -- changed here to my nom de plume/nom de guerre, of course, to protect the guilty:

1. LutheranChik needs you.
(Batting eyelashes wistfully into the ether...)

2. LutheranChik needs a term.
(A term for LutheranChik? An academic term, or a descriptive term? "Weird"?)

3. LutheranChik needs care 24 hours a day.
(How did they know?...)

4. LutheranChik needs the community's support.
(Yes; I'm all for community support.)

5. LutheranChik needs to get away from the problems of her relationship.
(You mean, as in not having one?)

6. LutheranChik needs to answer this question: Is my life worth living?
(Ooh...heavy...)

7. LutheranChik needs to remain available for caregiving and doctor's appointments.
(This one is actually pretty accurate.)

8. LutheranChik needs to keep moving south and west where there is more breeze.
(Does Grand Rapids count? I'm going there on Saturday.)

9. LutheranChik needs a break.
(From your mouth to God's ear.)

10. LutheranChik needs wit for this Emmy gig.
(Oh. I was thinking of maybe just singing my repertoire of 60's TV
theme songs.


As my friend Melancthon points out to me, you can substitute all sorts of phrases here. Try "[first name] wants," or "[first name] will," or "[first name] won't." Here are some gems from Googling "[LutheranChik] doesn't want to":

LutheranChik doesn't want to get too cute waiting until the last minute to make her monthly payments.

At nine, bedtime, LutheranChik doesn't want to go to her room.

I respect [sic] if LutheranChik doesn't want to discuss her sex life with us.

LutheranChik doesn't want to be like her mother.

LutheranChik doesn't want to see you. She's extremely upset. I can't believe you told her she was demon-possessed.

LutheranChik doesn't want to see the quarry. She wants to see the backseat of your car.

Go Googling. It's fun.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Tried this! Modesty, and a desire to keep this site clean, forbids me to say what I found!! But 99% was overtly sexual :-(

Who is this woman desperately seeking sex??!! Not me, I'm too old!! ;)

LoieJ said...

This is hysterical! Hmmmm. I don’t like that word. I did 12 because they get funkier and funnier. Fortunately not sexual.

Not using my real name….

1. ____ needs help.

2. ____ needs inventory yesterday.

3. _____ needs a new hairstyle.

4. _____ needs help after being laid up with the flu.

5. _____ needs to get rid of Dan.

6. ______ needs to die.

7. _____ needs a show of her own ASAP.

8. _____ needs to act fast and kill Superman in a day or less.

9. _____ needs the help of Superman.

10. _____ needs to stay awake to prevent an alien invasion of the earth.

11. _____ needs to find a black hole and disappear.

12. _____ needs a two piece business suit.

Andy Kaylor said...

That's pretty cool.

1. Melancthon needs some dancing
2. Melancthon needs your vote Monday night
3. Melancthon needs to appoint somebody to handle the media attention he's starting to get
4. Melancthon needs to change Trump's opinion
5. Melancthon needs a bit of Stevie Wonder and Billy Joel
6. Melancthon needs some time off from coding
7. Melancthon needs assistance in doing an inventory on his site
8. Melancthon needs our help
9. Melancthon needs to study a foreign language
10. Melancthon needs the $$ right now

Anonymous said...

OK - there weren't 10 direct references to "C"s needs - only 9, but the ones I found were interesting, to say the least!
----------------------------------

C needs to write some functions to figure out how that happened

C needs to find a new apartment

C needs work on Japanese grammar

C needs assistance with concerts, Music Sundays, and Cabarets.

C needs new study skills,

C needs to be approved
for governmental disability assistance

C needs to channel her strengths toward a focused vocation and take a holistic
view of her career.

C needs help to get on the criminal mastermind's track.

And the #1 thing C needs - you're gonna love this:

C needs a chrome pole and a garter so folks of that kind can place dollar bills in it.

Ummm... that's just about the last thing I need!

Anonymous said...

Wow! My doppleganger (is that the right word) has a much more... uh, sordid... life than I do!!!

Verdugo doesn't approve - ... Of course Verdugo's uncomfortable - she wants to bed her half sisters Daddy...

Verdugo sends her love to her fans and she wants to hear from those of you who were kind enough to help.

...an article says Verdugo wants to do gospel. ...

you know Verduoi wants to get closer to Abby. ...

Anonymous said...

"Verdugo needs" spawned such interesting repartee as Verdugo needs a beer and Verdugo needs a spanking...

LutheranChik said...

Gosh...mine seem so tame by comparison...

Because I share a first name with A Well-Known Person, I did have to edit out some of my results because the sentences would have been a dead giveaway. And I'm shy.;-)

What a hoot! Thanks, Derek.