Murphy's Law -- a huge, icy storm system is bearing down on Michigan, due to hit when I'm supposed to drive two hours up north to my next lay ministry retreat. It sounds like a great retreat -- studying the Psalms with Lisa Dahill, author of Truly Present.
My initial reaction, however, upon hearing the increasingly hysterical weather reports: I'm not killing myself for the ELCA.
I don't think I have ever been less motivated to continue in this program...not only because of The Troubles in my denomination, but because I've discovered I just don't understand the why of my particular track within lay ministry; ironically, this hit home for me most acutely after our last "Skill Day," when a variety of synodical folks made pitches for various lay ministry options in the ELCA.
In my program, we have no mentoring except for group discussions with a program graduate; and some vague, secretive evaluation process that I am apparently not invited to be an active participant in. Apart from threats to make us sign the Visions and Expectations document, I don't understand what the qualifying competencies are for graduation, or whatever it is that we do when we're through. Maybe there aren't any. Maybe this is just the churchy equivalent of the adult enrichment classes down at the community college.
I get the feeling that no one really gives a damn. And I fear that the "no one" is soon going to include me.