For I do not do the good that I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. -- St. Paul
If you knew, through your own experience, that you could do something every day that consistently made you aware of the loving embrace of God, that brought you peace, that made you feel more loving and forgiving toward others, that helped you make sense of your life...you'd do it; right?
Likewise, if you knew, through your own experience, that a behavior consistently made you angry and depressed, weakened your faith, caused occasion for you to sin against others, created disorder in your psyche...you'd avoid that behavior like the plague; right?
I've been neglecting the Daily Office and my own extemporaneous prayers lately...missing prayers, missing entire days of prayer, or else just phoning it in. Letting myself get sidetracked by stupid, stupid distractions. Not taking care of myself, then finding myself too exhausted to string two thoughts together at the end of the day.
On the other hand, I have been embroiled in a series of fruitless, circuitous theological slap-fights on Beliefnet. This after intending to make the avoidance of recreational argumentation a goal for my Lenten observance -- a vow that lasted all of, I think, two hours, to be sure, but that I've been violating with increasing vigor in the last week or so.
How foolish -- utterly foolish -- can I be?
Sigh. Sometimes this Christian thing is just so hard.