This is the time of year when classroom show-and-tell sessions across the nation are filled with children relating "What I Did This Summer."
If I had a show-and-tell to attend, I'd have plenty to tell, all right, about my adventures of the last few months. I'd have a few things to show too. (Even more if my camera hadn't died midway through the Upper Peninsula trip...as we speak it's en route to the manufacturer, and I'm going through major grumpy withdrawal.)
Here are some of the things I did this summer:
Planted a purple perennial garden (say that 20 times fast).
Got taken out to a swanky white-tablecloth fancy eatin' place.
Ate a pasty in Paradise.
Saw John McCutcheon and Claudia Schmmidt in concert.
Was introduced to the cultural phenomenon of Dog the Bounty Hunter.
Watched fireworks on the Fourth of July.
Visited Bronner's in Frankenmuth, the mother lode of both tasteful and tacky retail Christmas bling, with two enthusiastic power shoppers entranced by the fabulousness of it all, their amused aunt and their shopping-averse mother/in-law, who didn't really start having fun until we began playing an interesting human-interest variation on the "padiddle" game. (Which I believe I won.)
Had a picnic.
Participated in a Kidney Stone Passing Vigil.
But, alas, I didn't get everywhere, geographically or otherwise, I'd intended to this season. Here are some of the things I didn't do:
Repaint the porch pillars and my Bilco door.
Get a load of landscaping stone to go around my inherited house and hide the butt-ugly external insulation that the builders, Dumb and Dumber, Inc., convinced my parents to wrap around the foundation, instead of insulating and finishing the basement.
Learn to play euchre. (My offer still stands -- batch o' cookies to anyone who can teach me how to play.)
Get to a minor-league ballgame.
Start exercise walking again.
Devise a workable weekly routine for doing my household chores -- one that is maintenance, not disaster, oriented.
Raise a crop of tomatoes, thanks to our neighborhood herd of deer, who stripped my potted tomato plants to shreds.
Read very much.